by Fadia Patterson
I’m the oldest of seven sisters and one brother and I’ve found that I’ve had a lot of responsibility. Even as I was growing up, I felt like the third parent in the house. I was certain that my sisters were looking up to me, so I made decisions to lead by example. One of those decisions has been to be celibate until marriage. As a child I was grateful I received a lot of affirmation from my earthly father and as I grew closer to Christ; I learned of the affirmations and promises of my heavenly father. Learning that he would not ” withhold any good thing”; “I’m his bride”; and that my body was “the temple of the holy spirit”; helped to guide my path in life. Even as a young professional in my late 20’s, I hold on to those promises.
I believe God has blessed me and spared me from so much because I made this decision.
By popular cultural standards, sex is something that should be explored even outside of marriage. The justification for this is based on emotions and superficial desires. For example if you are in love, pop culture says that sex is the act that should follow instead of being prayerful and asking God for guidance in that relationship. As we read in the book of Corinthians, Love is way more than just sex! And if none of these attributes that define love are not present; is it actual love? It is certainly not love defined by God. His love is way more than acts done in the bedroom. I have never heard of a Godly woman who has given herself to someone other than her husband and be proud of it. I believe that I’ve dodged deep heartache and headaches in my life because of this decision. My decision to remain pure until marriage was not a popular one; but I’m grateful for the ability and God’s grace to stand strong. Many years ago, I felt God tell me to guard my heart and be selective on whom I am giving my love and myself to. Most importantly, this does not have to be our decision alone, if we include God in our dating/courting life. Fit your dating life into your spiritual life instead of fitting your spiritual life into your dating life and watch God work on your behalf.
