Everyone needs to rely on someone to some extent. Before we were born, we relied on our mother to nurture us in her womb, to take care of herself so that we would have the opportunity at life. Children rely on their caretakers to answer their million “why questions”. Teenagers often believed they have all the answers to life, but rely on their parents to steer them in right direction as they enter adulthood. And the need for nurture and attention continues in every stage of life. The type of attention received during the early stages of life often determines how adults reciprocate attention. Some women have expressed their need to give and receive attention in an unhealthy manner.
Women need attention. We need someone to recognize our accomplishments, complement our new look, encourage our dreams, listen to our daily news flashes, love us at our best and worse; the list could go on. Unfortunately, we don’t always realize our need for attention robs us of developing healthy relationships because we are focused on the praise. As a result, we sometimes compromise who we are to receive attention from anyone. We become promiscuous, wear revealing clothes, point out faults in others, or behave obnoxiously. We may even become overachievers to appeal to others, regardless if it’s God’s will or not. We choose to market, or accentuate “certain” body parts and personality traits to make ourselves noticeable, even if it’s for a moment. Some women have accepted unhealthy attention, from family, friends, or lovers, because they lacked healthy attention as a child, or in their current relationships. Some have yet to accept who they are and whose they are; if someone is handing out attention, they’re next in line to receive it (good or bad).
Ephesians 2:10, “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the things he planned for us long ago.”
“Good” attention will push you towards your goals and purpose. It plants seeds to help you grow in areas other than your ego. It helps develop love for others. You won’t feel the need to be the center of attention. Others will naturally gravitate toward you because you are positive and loving. Good relationships help nurture your ministries; it also provides constructive criticism regarding your weaknesses. You’ll get busy nurturing others and God will send the right people to nurture you and give you healthy attention. It gives balance to your life so you can see yourself the way God sees you. However, if you allow the wrong people to uplift you, they may place you on a pedestal higher than you should be; it will make you lose your balance in other areas like praising and worshipping God. You’ll worship the praises they give you instead.
1 Peter 3:3-7, “Do not let your adornment be merely outward – arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel – 4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” This scripture doesn’t mean you can’t dress nicely and care about your appearance; but realize your true beauty comes from within. And God is so wonderful because He tells you how to present yourselves to Him because he wants you to draw closer to HIM.
Romans 12:2, “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
“Bad” attention drains the best parts of you because you are constantly transforming yourself into the latest “it thing”. It masks your true essence and covers you with layers of other people’s opinions; people’s opinion of you will change. It’s like you’ve become a puppet waiting for the next person to tell you you’re beautiful, talented, or anointed. You start to join ministries because you are hoping the pastor or a fellow church member notices you. If they don’t, then you switch ministries still seeking praise to uplift yourself. While you’re busy seeking attention from others, you neglect your first command of loving and attending to the needs of others.
2 John 1:5, “And now I plead with you, lady, not as though I wrote a new commandment to you, but that which we have heard from the beginning: that we love one another.”
Isaiah 1:17, “Learn to do right, seek justice, rebuke the oppressor, defend the fatherless, plead for the widow.”
You are the apple of God’s eye! Allow him to love, nurture, and attend to your every need. His thoughts about you won’t change regardless of your status, accomplishments, or failures. His love for you goes beyond anything you could ever measure against man’s opinion of you. You have to reaffirm who God has ordained you to be. Spend time away from others and get to know Him; He will reveal who you are to Him. Set standards and follow through with them. Reward yourself for your accomplishments and let that be enough. Enjoy being who you are without waiting for someone else’s approval. Better yet, enjoy being who God says you are because only His approval counts.
Deuteronomy 32:9 -10, “For the Lord’s portion is His people; Jacob is the place of His inheritance. He found him in a desert land and in the wasteland, a howling wilderness; He encircled him, He instructed him, and he kept him as the apple of His eye.”
The longing, the craving, the gravitating towards comfort and love can be and is very intoxicating. It is overwhelming at times. When you have gone through trauma of any kind, when you do not currently have the love in your life that you desire, or when you do not completely and wholeheartedly love yourself sometimes you look for others to overwhelm you with “love”. Allowing God to shower you with the blessings that you deserve is the most comforting healing love you can ever experience. So, how do we as women satisfy this insatiable craving for acceptance and love? Letting God pour his love over us and into our hearts is ideal, however, for many women one answer to this question is to get into a relationship just for the sake of not being alone.
Many people have a thought process where they say, either internally or out loud,” It is better than being by myself, something is better than nothing.” Saying negative statements will begin to translate into something deeper within the heart of a woman. When your “longing” becomes “desperate” it is a recipe for danger. It will become problematic for the core of your being… the essence of who you are as an individual. God does not want you to feel incomplete or lost. In John 5:6, when God asks “Wilt thou be made whole?” to the sick man lying there before him, God is not just asking if he wanted to get well, but to impart an expectation for healing … to believe with everything in your being that God’s will and love is all you need.
Have you ever heard the phrase “you are what you eat?” Well, an equally important saying is a phrase that states, “You are what you SPEAK!” Something better than nothing means you will accept almost anything and everything into your life. There is no boundary in place. There is no protection established for yourself. There is no room for true love.
I know because I have been there before.
I came from a childhood of not having love from my biological father and being molested at an early age. I grew up without efficient coping skills, so I allowed myself to let people into my life that did not honor God, honor me, and that did not love themselves. I looked for love elsewhere instead of allowing God to overwhelm me with his love. I did not take the leap of faith in knowing that God’s plan and destiny for me in all of its goodness was staring me right smack dab in the face. I was too afraid to step into my blessings because I did not love myself enough to do it.
I had to learn to depend on God in a new way. I had to open my heart more. No more fear. No more procrastination. I laid all of my fears, my hurt, and my pain out before The Lord. Within my prayer I also began to worship God and praise him in a new way. This allowed me to feel closer to God. See, many times we block our own blessings … you have to remember to get out of your own way. When you are out of the way and let the blessings flow from heaven you WILL receive your hearts desire.
I have four beautiful scriptures to share with you that I hope will encourage and empower you to allow God in to shower you with love.
Joshua 1:9, “Have not I commanded you? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be you dismayed: for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”
God is the source of our strength. He made it so that you are who you are and who you are destined to be. You are special and he loves you.
Romans 15:13, “Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.”
He is the God of Hope, love, understanding, and forgiveness. Just believe.
Isaiah 43:1 But now thus said the LORD that created you, O Jacob, and he that formed you, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed you, I have called you by your name; you are mine.
You belong to God and you are his child. All of your blessings are before you. All you have to do is reach out and grab it.
Isaiah 12:2, “Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the LORD JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation”.
Let God heal your heartache. When your heartache begins to heal you will be able to accept all things new that he has prepared for you. This includes new careers, friends, relationships, and a new life.
When you feel like no one cares about you or loves you, when you feel like there is a void that cannot be filled, when you are feeling sad and miserable, give God a real 100% chance to come in and change your life. To have a healthy relationship with someone takes healing within your heart. It takes patience in waiting for an individual that is beneficial for you. It takes you allowing God to overwhelm you with his love.
I would love for you to comment and join in on the discussion! How has God touched your life?
Cassie Timberlake is a Momprenuer, Certified Professional Coach ,Mentor, Speaker, Writer, and Victorious Survivor. She believes that by Healing, Restoring, and Harmonizing your heart, which is the center of your emotional compass—a spectacular journey that brings you to your destiny.
I am a big, big, BIG Twilight fan. I am sad that there won’t be any more movies, yet I am very satisfied with how it ended. Today, I heard the song from the soundtrack: “A Thousand Years” by Christina PerriI love this song. Besides this being a love song (obviously) the lyrics just speak so much to me.”— I have died everyday waiting for youDarling don’t be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years. I’ll love you for a thousand more.— And all along I believed I would find youTime has brought your heart to me, I have love you for a thousand years. I’ll love you for a thousand more.— One step closer”Now I don’t know anyone who has or can love anyone for a thousand years… and in 2013, a couple lasting longer than 5-10 years is so rare that upon meeting me, guys ask “Are your parents still together?” And that is not only sad, that is a post for another day. There are a lot of single people out there. They say that they haven’t found the right one or they prefer to be single. For those who prefer it-good for you. For those who don’t, let’s talk about those lyrics I love…
“—-I have died everyday waiting for you…”
What does that mean? Obviously, it is not literal. If you physically died you could not live to see another day. I believe that this lyric means a part of her died everyday until the love of her life found her. And what does that mean? If we want to be in a relationship/married we have to die everyday. A little piece of us has to die in order to make room for someone else. We have to die everyday to ourselves. Because once you are in a relationship and/or married it’s not about you anymore. The world does not revolve around you. You can’t do whatever you want, move wherever you want, or make decisions on your own anymore. You begin sharing a life with someone. So that means you have someone to be accountable to and responsible for. Someone depends on you. Someone needs you. Someone expects things of you. And if you have not died a little everyday to every selfish desire and every “me” attitude you have, you will have to keep waiting…And ladies, that is the key word for you. If you want to be married you must wait. Wait. Do not go looking. Do not “put yourself out there” like society (or your friends) may say. Just wait. I read something recently that said, when Eve was being created/prepared for Adam, God put him in a deep sleep. And it wasn’t until Eve was complete that God woke Adam up and then presented Eve to him. {Genesis 2:21-23}So ladies, what we can get from that is:1) We have been created for our husband – there is someone out there for us. Just for us. We were made for that one man. Therefore he won’t be with someone else. And if he is, he won’t be for long. Remember, Adam was sleeping. What God has for you is for you. But also remember, thou shall not covet!2) When single, we are being prepared for our husband- so don’t sweat it. If anything, just love God, love yourself, and get ready. Do what you need to do to be ready for that life with someone you want. Finish school. Start your career. Learn how to cook and keep a good house. Clean up your credit. Forgive and let go of the past. Take your focus off getting a man and put it on living right and being whole. 3) While God is preparing us, our man is sleeping- so that is why I say don’t go looking or put yourself out there. Your man is sleeping right now and won’t see you anyway! 4) When we are ready, God will wake up our Adam and present us to him- We will be presented. We won’t have to present ourselves. We won’t have to wear our “freak’um” dress to our friend’s birthday party to grab his attention. God will work the situation and timing out just right that our Adam will see us (when we are ready) and he will claim us and call us his woman (fiance/wife/ Mrs.) just as Adam did {Gen 2:23}
“—All along I believed I would find you…”
All the while you are waiting (ladies) and looking (fellas) believe. If you can believe it you can achieve it. That’s what one of my Old Catholic schoolteachers used to say. And it is true. Once we make our mind up about something or decide something it is as good as done and nothing else matters. So make up your mind that your mate exists and you will come together at the right time and the right place. Decide not to worry about the details. Decide to just believe. Believe that there is someone specifically made just for you. Who will be everything you could ever want and exactly what you need. Believe it like I believe I have the cutest kid in America. Believe it just like you believe can’t any choir sing like your church choir. Believe it just like you believe that your mama’s cooking is the best. Believe it like you believe you look good in your favorite jeans. Believe it like those folks who go on American Idol, with no talent whatsoever, believe they sound like Mariah Carey or Whitney Houston. Believe it like that!Don’t fear. Don’t doubt. Don’t get dismayed. Don’t watch your biological clock. Don’t worry about always being a bridesmaid and never a bride. Don’t worry about all your boys having kids and here you are with no kids AND no girl. It’s better to wait a thousand years for the right one than live a day with the wrong one.
And remember, each day that passes you’re “one step closer….”
Brandi is thirty-one year old, single mother. She is a Praise and Worship leader at her church and Sunday School teacher. Brandi works as a clinical trainer working with children with Autism. She has a passion for writing and presently working on a book. Brandi strives to seek out ways (with the leading of the Holy Spirit) to touch people’s hearts and change lives one piece (of writing) at a time.
As human beings who are greatly attracted to a life of ease, when hardships come, we are often tempted to question God and become frustrated. Many times we wonder “why me?” and if you’ve ever wrestled that question with God with the intensity of pain and struggle burdening you, it’s what I personally refer to as a circular question.
The answer always seems to be that we must trust that God is working in ways we cannot understand, that His ways are not our ways (Is 55:8), and that if we believe in His character we must trust that in His love for us He is working for our greater good throughout our lives in every situation. Honestly, it’s easy to talk that as truth, even easier to write it– but, when the rubber meets the road, most of us wrestle with that from time to time.
John Chapter 9 talks about a young boy blind from birth. His disciples must have wondered the question we often contemplate, why? They asked, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus responded in a way that is notable and sometimes troubling to believers, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” (vs 3)
Though, I do not believe that God would cause illness, disease, suffering as a result of the sin of others, etc… I do believe fully believe that a Sovereign God allows such things into our life for many reasons– one of which is “that the works of God might be displayed…”
Can I just shoot straight? I don’t have easy sugar coated answers. Not for children suffering. Or diseases taking lives that have not been fully lived. Not for poverty and families without homes. Or war. Not for natural disasters destructive trails of homes, businesses, and lives. Not for murder, theft, and crimes of horrendous natures.
But here is what I know– I know– with every fiber of my being. God has the ability to work through any and every situation. Nothing is impossible, too big, too much of a surprise or headache for the All Powerful Great “I am.”
And, as we face unthinkable hardships and trials in this world, I believe His desire is to orchestrate our lives in a way that each of our individual stories is one in which, “The works of God are displayed.”
When we allow to God enter our brokenness… His healing power is displayed.
When we allow God to be sufficient in times of need… His provision is displayed.
When we choose to be obedient even when the cost is great… His faithfulness is displayed.
When we trust Him in the face of opposition and obstacles… His mountain moving strength is displayed.
When we surrender our fears and anxiety during emotional storms… His calming and peaceful presence is displayed.
Wherever you are, whatever you are facing– God’s desire is that your life is not only a reflection of your love relationship with Him, but, also that your life is evidence of the manifested power of God at work. Strive to live your life aligned with Gods plans, so that others too may see the miracle, and that their response will also be… to praise God!
For me, this season of obedience looks like a whole lot of sleepless nights, studying for 4-6 hours every day, an exhausted brain, constantly rejecting opportunities to hang out with friends so that my free time can be spent with my beloved, trying to squeeze out some time at the end of the day to hang out with my family.
In the past I have typically been content with whatever the LORD has called me to do. I have grown to be comfortable with waking up in the early hours of the morning (even though I am NOT a morning person) to spend time with Him. I have even embraced the fact that I will forever been known as weird because God has this idea often that I need to go up to random people and pray for them or encourage them with whatever Word He has put on my heart for them. But then, the LORD decided to stretch me even further, when He decided to call me to this crazy wild ride called “law school”.
Now, I am not totally going to blame this on the LORD because although I know that this is how He specifically wants me to use my talents to serve the 27 million people in slavery today, I did have the desire to go to law school and I believe that when God calls you to do something, He will put a desire (sometimes it may be a really small desire) in your heart for what He has called you to do, but that does not mean it will be easy.
What does obedience to the LORD look like in this season of your life?
That is not an easy question to answer. If you don’t spend a lot of time in His presence; enough to discern His will—It could be as simple as sitting with your sick neighbor and loving on them, or as complex as moving to another country to show people the love of Jesus. Either way, you play a very important role in His Kingdom coming to earth and sometimes you will be required to give of yourself and your resources until it absolutely stretches you and hurts.
In those moments when you are the most stretched for His Glory, let your heart echo the words of David in 2 Samuel 24:24 “I will not give to the LORD an offering that cost nothing”
Have you ever felt like things are not going the way you would like for them to. Being at a place in life and wondering what are you doing there. Being at a job that you know is not connected to your passion. Well, these are all questions that I have asked myself millions of times. Coming to that place of crossroads in every year that pass. Sometimes I wonder why am I here. Different life situations we are put in will cause us to think. What if this situation is permanent, and I will never get out. That is not true, you can always turn a negative situation into a positive opportunity. One person in the Bible, which I love to read about, is Joseph found in the book of Genesis. Let’s look at Joseph through the different events that took place in his life and how he turned those negative situations into positive opportunities. Because of many things that he went through, he still rose to the top.
Genesis 37 talks about Joseph, who was seventeen years old, the son of Jacob and the youngest of all his brothers. Joseph was a big dreamer and saw the big picture in a lot of things. One day Joseph had a dream and decided to share it with his brothers. Sometimes I wonder was that a mistake on his part, but not really. Once he shared the dream that all his brothers were sheaves and they bowed down to him as a sheaf. Joseph brothers’ did not like it. That wasn’t all, he shared another dream that God gave him. This time he dreamed that the moon, stars, and sun was going to bow down to him. They had enough, so his brothers plotted to kill him. But, one brother stood for Joseph and said no.
After that the other brothers decided to throw him into a pit and sell him into slavery. After they sold him into slavery, he was sold again to an Egyptian officer named Potiphar who was an officer for King Pharaoh.
Joseph worked under Potiphar as a lead workman in the house. Potiphar’s wife thought Joseph was a very attractive man and sought after him. Joseph kept denying her, and that did not make her happy. So, she accused Joseph of rape. He was thrown into prison for several years and became an excellent lead worker there. Joseph was released years later, and because he was a man of God. There was an excellent spirit upon him in getting things done as a leader. He eventually, became the governor overseer in his city.
In the other surrounding cities, there was a famine in the land, so people and families had to come to him for food, including his own brothers and father. Both of the dreams that God had given him in an early age was now manifesting in his later years of his life, regardless of all the obstacles he faced.
What I am saying, is no matter where you start in life, there always will be obstacles that get in your way. Just don’t allow the obstacles to stop you from progressing in your passion and love of what you were put here on this earth to do. Who knew that I would be today writing articles to inspire people? Writing blogs, or writing spoken word poetry? God always knew. One day soon, I hope to write a book that will motivate and inspire people. I encourage you to step out on your dreams and follow them. No matter how rough things get or try to stop you, push pass the obstacle and jump over the hurdle to conquer your passion and dream. Joseph kept going until the dreams God showed him manifested.
How are you going to push pass obstacles and pursue your dreams?
When I was in college I left my apartment on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 7:17 a.m. to make the bus to campus. After a short bus ride, it took me three minutes to walk to my Spanish class from the campus bus stop. I then had six minutes before class to relax. I had a routine.
Years later, as a wife and writer now, my thoughts are a tangle of things: dinner plans, story ideas, to-do lists. I developed a remedy for that confusion. I developed another routine.
Because routines are one of my favorite things. They keep life orderly and neat and planned, but the awful truth about them is they don’t need Jesus.
Just before Joshua sets out to lead the Israelites to the Promised Land and just as he picks up from where Moses left off, God tells him to “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.”
Now I’m sure the Israelites had a system down. They knew how to set up camp quickly and how to travel light. They knew how to get a stubborn camel moving and which packs carried the most. They were experts, and when we become experts at scheduling and routine, it’s easy to not need Christ.
Until we crash. Until something doesn’t fit in the routine. Until something wrecks our remedy, and we are calling for help.
But what if we didn’t wait until the crash? What if we took routine and gave it to the Lord? Routines may not need Jesus, but you and I, we do.
Dwight Edwards writes in “Revolution Within: A Fresh Look at Supernatural Living”:
“Apart from me you can do nothing” – Those words have not a trace of exaggeration in them. Yet our flesh tries to keep the prideful hope alive of accomplishing something worthy on our own. Usually we try it in areas that we consider our strengths: our intellect, our personal discipline, our godly upbringing (if we were so blessed), our personality traits, or our Christian training or education.”
Routines are great at getting us to survive the day, at getting us through the day, but God wants so much more from each day. I don’t want to just make it through each day, and my schedule, my idea, my remedy, is just barely getting me there.
God called Joshua and Moses to faithfully pursue him and trust him every day. God doesn’t need to see our planning skills. He wants to see us follow him. He wants to see us love him more than a schedule, with that and I’m reminded of Paul’s words to the Galatians: “Are you so foolish? After beginning by means of the Spirit, are you now trying to finish by means of the flesh?”
We don’t need to look at our imperfections as weaknesses. God is writing our story and there is a purpose for every one of them. In his attempt to steal, kill, and destroy Satan will afflict God’s children, all the while doing God’s will. Rom 8:28, “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
The people God used were not perfect; they were outright dysfunctional people. David lusted after Bathsheba, a married woman. He impregnated her after committing adultery and had her husband, Uriah, killed (2 Samuel 11). Sarah let her husband sleep with another woman then resented and hated her afterwards (Genesis 16). Moses had a hard time controlling his temper (Exodus 32:19, Numbers 20:11). Jonah ran from God (Jonah 1:3). Hosea’s wife was a promiscuous woman (Hosea 1). Paul murdered Christians (Acts 8), before God blinded him for three days, and revealed the truth to him (Acts 9:9). So you see, God does not use perfect people. He loves you and uses you just the way you are.
In 2 Corinthians Paul talks about a thorn in his flesh. He explains this thorn as a painful thorn, a thorn that Satan put there, but God uses for a greater purpose.
2 Corinthians 12:7-10, “In order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Paul asked the Lord to remove this thorn three times, but he was given something better. God gave Paul the understanding of His will and the truth that His grace is sufficient. Paul said, “In order to keep me from becoming conceited.” Nothing is worse than a “holier than thou” Christian. Paul delighted in his imperfections because he knew they produced humility and Christ-likeness. He also knew that only God could make him whole and whatever he lacked God would make up the rest, “For when I am weak, then I am strong”. Through it all, Paul’s source of strength was God. So boast about your imperfections because you have the ability to lean on God too!
We are created to be vessels full of the knowledge of the glory of God. 2 Corinthians 4:6-7, “For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.”
If we look at our imperfections as cracks in the potter’s clay jars we can see that they are placed there for the purpose of allowing God’s light to shine through them. Cracks allow others to see God’s forgiveness, mercy, redemption, healing, and love at work in our lives. They allow us to identify with one another and come together and say “oh, you too?” The cracks are a witness of God’s glory to people who don’t know the healing power of Christ, the power that holds us together through the brokenness. So delight in your cracks.
Allow me to share the story of the broken pot…
A water bearer in India had two large pots. Each hung on an end of a pole, which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the masters house. The cracked pot arrived only half full.
For a full two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his master’s house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do. After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream.
“I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you.” “Why?” asked the bearer. “What are you ashamed of?” “I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your masters house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work, and you don’t get full value from your efforts.” the pot said.
The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, “As we return to the masters house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path.”
Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again the Pot apologized to the bearer for its failure.
The bearer said to the pot, “Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pots side? That’s because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you’ve watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my masters table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.”
We all have imperfections. We are all cracked jars of clay. Never the less our cracks are used to grace the Father’s table. Delight in your imperfections.
Citation: http://www.gbumc.org/assets/1323/naomi_table_web.pdf
When we are in the midst of hurt, sadness, sorrow and confusion, it’s difficult to understand why it’s happening – let alone how it could be beneficial.
Being “broken” doesn’t necessarily mean that something dramatic or drastic had to happen to you to get you to that point. Each one of us is completely broken spiritually, mentally, and sometimes even physically if we do not know the love of Jesus. It is this love that allows us to function normally, it is to the human spirit as oxygen is to the heart. We were all born broken, and only become who we were created to be once we become one with our Creator.
It is our brokenness that takes us on a journey that will be beneficial to not only God, but to us as well. How, you might ask? It’s really quite simple: brokenness gives us a testimony, which in return brings glory to God. Without a testimony, we would not be able to reach people for Jesus; they would never know His love. A testimony is the link that helps the witness connect the listener to Jesus. As it says in 2 Corinthians 1 v 3-4: “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.”
We can never give away anything that we ourselves have never had. When we are in the midst of these tribulations, it seems impossible to believe that anything good could come out of it, but rest assured, there will be plenty of good to tell. The truth is, we are all broken in our own way, and some of the things that God has in store for us requires us to be whole. It requires one to be so in tune with the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
Sometimes, when we rush into things and find it hard to understand why we seem to be stagnant, we should stop and ask God what He’s trying to tell us. More often than not, it’s just Him trying to protect us from what He knows will damage us even more. For example, it’s very common for single women to focus on their desire for a husband and kids, more than they focus on allowing God to heal them from past hurts, disappointments and mistakes that they might be ready to step into their desired season.
When you’re married, there are so many other things that need your attention. Catering to the needs of your husband, running a household, caring for your kids, to name a few, will be on your list of priorities. No longer will you have the amount of time and focus to be able to seek God intensely about whatever it is that might withhold you from experiencing His complete joy in a marriage as He intends. This can cause deeper issues such as depression and malfunction. This is but one example of the importance of healing and the preparedness of a heart.
Seek God about the hidden corners of your heart, the little things from the past that you have forgotten about, the hidden emotions that were not dealt with after that last break-up. Those will cause you to go into a new season with old baggage, when God intends for you to go into it whole and ready to receive the blessings that come along with it. If you wait patiently and actively for the Lord, you will surely have a testimony to share. A testimony of how God has healed you of your hurtful past. A past that was once confusing, but now makes perfect sense. You will be able to comfort other women who find themselves in your shoes. A testimony that will bring life and inspiration to so many others. A testimony that will sow seeds of hope in the hearts of those who have lost faith in Jesus. You will be the salt that brings the lost to the light of Christ.
Wait patiently for the Lord to bring your breakthrough as He comforts you and equips you to comfort others. Fear not and do not be dismayed, it is our brokenness that strengthens our relationship with our compassionate Saviour and allows us to grow.
If there is something, just one thing, that God has vividly shown in my life recently, it’s that we need each other to get through the struggles of this life. I cannot stress enough, the importance of how you choose your friends.
Proverbs 13:20, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
I am a strong believer in being the light in the darkness, being the Good Samaritan, and showing believers and non-believers the life of love that a Christian individual should walk. However, it is vital that we have a support system of fellow believers to encourage us, pick us up when we fall down, and provide God’s wisdom in times of celebration just as much as in times of darkness.
John 15:12-15 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you.
Recently, a friend of mine and I discussed the difference between friendships based on convenience and friendships based on commitment. When you associate yourself with people that are simply convenient, you will find yourself with nothing when God calls you elsewhere and those friends do not care to pursue your friendship, because that element of convenience is gone. However, when you choose Christian friends that walk in love, you have a support system and community that will be invested in your life no matter where you are, no matter what you are doing, they will not leave you alone.
2 Kings 2:2 And Elijah said to Elisha, “Please stay here, for the LORD has sent me as far as Bethel.” But Elisha said, “As the LORD lives, and as you yourself live, I will not leave you.” So they went down to Bethel.
I encourage and challenge you to evaluate your friendships. Are you basing your friendships off of convenience or commitment? Are you going to be the friend who will leave the office or classroom to answer a call to be there for someone? Do you know a friend would do the same for you?
C.S. Lewis wrote, “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.”
My prayer is that you evaluate your friendships and relationships and ask God to provide people to walk in faith and love with. Ask Him for friendships that will assure you, you are not alone.
